The Meeting Black Hole

Deep in the corporate cosmos, there’s a phenomenon known to swallow hours whole: the endless meeting.

A routine status meeting takes a turn for the astronomical. The conference table elongates toward a swirling black hole forming at its center, sucking in stray paper clips, meeting agendas, and the will to live.

PowerPoint printouts orbit the void like lost satellites. The team watches in half-awake horror as the wall clock’s hands stretch toward the singularity – time literally flying. One attendee clings to a coffee mug as if it’s a life raft, while another feels their sanity spaghettified by yet another round of “let’s circle back on that.”

The relativity of boredom sets in: an hour in this room feels like a century outside. When the meeting finally adjourns and spits everyone back out, they stumble away light-years older and none the wiser.

The punchline is written in the stars (and on everyone’s faces): that meeting, like so many others, really could have just been an email.